Testing Limits
Hi guys! Have you missed us?
The other day, I was describing my evening before to a colleague over lunch. It was one of those "mom/dad say something Ollie doesn't like....he hits/screams...receives a time-out... through which he has a tantrum...it is explained...we make up...we say something he doesn't like...he hits/screams...receives a time-out...through which he has a tantrum...it is explained...we make up" kind of nights. When you put him to bed just a tad early because you just can't take anymore, and then have a whack-a-mole night which ends with everyone screaming, nearly everyone crying, and finally a quiet house at 10pm because everyone has passed out, exhausted, in (hopefully) their own beds.
She laughed at me and said, "Sounds like he's testing your limits."
I looked up, wearily, from my drippy ham sandwich and responded sarcastically, "Ya think?"
Welcome to the past 6 months.
I am SO SICK of time outs when he's been naughty. Most of the time, though, he's just a little mischief maker. I never know what's going to come out of his mouth. Have to admit it, though. Whether he's saying really insightful, hilarious things that just tells it like it is, or turning around after you asked him to get dressed wearing nothing but a rainbow "Consent is Sexy" Pride bracelet, having a 4-year-old always keeps you on your toes.
I'm pulling homemade chicken burritos out of the oven as Ollie points to the microwave and says to the new babysitter, who is also a teacher at his daycare:
"And THAT'S where we make dinner."
Ollie: "I just slipped."
Me: "Are you okay?"
Ollie: "Yeah. You don't have to worry about it 'cuz you weren't the one who slipped."
We walk into a restroom and Ollie takes down his pants and dribbles a little in his underwear:
Ollie: "FICK!"
Me: "What did you just say?"
Ollie: "I meant to say SICK and GROSS and ended up saying FICK. What does FICK mean, Mama?"
While practicing writing his name:
Me: "Ollie, that's not your name. You're just drawing a picture. Please show me how you write your name."
Ollie: "Yes it is. My new name is O-L-Dinosaur-R."
Ollie: "Where you going, Daddy?"
Doug: "I have to practice for my race."
Ollie: "Yeah, so when you get to your race the people don't say he doesn't know how to run."
Me and Doug are trying to have a private conversation about him at the dinner table:
Ollie: "What are you saying?"
Doug: "Don't worry about it - we're having a sidebar to discuss this."
Ollie: "What's a side bar?"
Me/Doug: (ignoring him and whispering)
Ollie: "You can't have a side bar! Why are you having a side bar? Can I have it? Does it have peanuts?"
Standing by the heat vent after playing outside:
Me: "Ollie, please come over here and take off your wet boots."
Ollie: "I'm just gettin' all da cold offa me."
Trying to get him to eat his breakfast while he insists on wearing a Captain America mask:
"Avengers don't eat breffkast 'cuz their mask-es get messy."
On mischief: "You don't wanna be like that sneaky snake from God and Even."
On animal celebrations: "Dogs can't have birthdays 'cuz they can't blow out candles."
On sports: "We're not wrestling. We're just getting ourselves exercised."
On MLK, Jr. Day: "People din't agree wif Marty King so they deaded him."
On stomach issues: "Liquid poop is hilarious."
On Easter (at church in front of the congregation, very loudly): "He got alive!"
On sneezing: "UGH! I keep bless you-ing!"
After a particularly trying argument:
Ollie: "I don't like to fight with you, Mama."
Me: "I don't like to fight with you either, Ollie. You're a good boy, Love."
Ollie: "Sometimes I just do bad things. But that's okay because we can always change."
Me: (laughing) "Yes, we can, sweetie."
Ollie: "I like making you laugh, Mama."
Ollie: "Mama, I love Daddy more and you more than the whole world and all the humans."
The other day, I was describing my evening before to a colleague over lunch. It was one of those "mom/dad say something Ollie doesn't like....he hits/screams...receives a time-out... through which he has a tantrum...it is explained...we make up...we say something he doesn't like...he hits/screams...receives a time-out...through which he has a tantrum...it is explained...we make up" kind of nights. When you put him to bed just a tad early because you just can't take anymore, and then have a whack-a-mole night which ends with everyone screaming, nearly everyone crying, and finally a quiet house at 10pm because everyone has passed out, exhausted, in (hopefully) their own beds.
She laughed at me and said, "Sounds like he's testing your limits."
I looked up, wearily, from my drippy ham sandwich and responded sarcastically, "Ya think?"
Welcome to the past 6 months.
I am SO SICK of time outs when he's been naughty. Most of the time, though, he's just a little mischief maker. I never know what's going to come out of his mouth. Have to admit it, though. Whether he's saying really insightful, hilarious things that just tells it like it is, or turning around after you asked him to get dressed wearing nothing but a rainbow "Consent is Sexy" Pride bracelet, having a 4-year-old always keeps you on your toes.
I'm pulling homemade chicken burritos out of the oven as Ollie points to the microwave and says to the new babysitter, who is also a teacher at his daycare:
"And THAT'S where we make dinner."
Ollie: "I just slipped."
Me: "Are you okay?"
Ollie: "Yeah. You don't have to worry about it 'cuz you weren't the one who slipped."
We walk into a restroom and Ollie takes down his pants and dribbles a little in his underwear:
Ollie: "FICK!"
Me: "What did you just say?"
Ollie: "I meant to say SICK and GROSS and ended up saying FICK. What does FICK mean, Mama?"
While practicing writing his name:
Me: "Ollie, that's not your name. You're just drawing a picture. Please show me how you write your name."
Ollie: "Yes it is. My new name is O-L-Dinosaur-R."
Ollie: "Where you going, Daddy?"
Doug: "I have to practice for my race."
Ollie: "Yeah, so when you get to your race the people don't say he doesn't know how to run."
Me and Doug are trying to have a private conversation about him at the dinner table:
Ollie: "What are you saying?"
Doug: "Don't worry about it - we're having a sidebar to discuss this."
Ollie: "What's a side bar?"
Me/Doug: (ignoring him and whispering)
Ollie: "You can't have a side bar! Why are you having a side bar? Can I have it? Does it have peanuts?"
Standing by the heat vent after playing outside:
Me: "Ollie, please come over here and take off your wet boots."
Ollie: "I'm just gettin' all da cold offa me."
Trying to get him to eat his breakfast while he insists on wearing a Captain America mask:
"Avengers don't eat breffkast 'cuz their mask-es get messy."
On mischief: "You don't wanna be like that sneaky snake from God and Even."
On animal celebrations: "Dogs can't have birthdays 'cuz they can't blow out candles."
On sports: "We're not wrestling. We're just getting ourselves exercised."
On MLK, Jr. Day: "People din't agree wif Marty King so they deaded him."
On stomach issues: "Liquid poop is hilarious."
On Easter (at church in front of the congregation, very loudly): "He got alive!"
On sneezing: "UGH! I keep bless you-ing!"
After a particularly trying argument:
Ollie: "I don't like to fight with you, Mama."
Me: "I don't like to fight with you either, Ollie. You're a good boy, Love."
Ollie: "Sometimes I just do bad things. But that's okay because we can always change."
Me: (laughing) "Yes, we can, sweetie."
Ollie: "I like making you laugh, Mama."
Ollie: "Mama, I love Daddy more and you more than the whole world and all the humans."
He's definitely been testing our limits lately. He turns around, though, and is so sweet, I wish he would stay like this forever! And then he locks me out of the house again. So...back to square one. Little stinker! TIME OUT!
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