New Mama Thoughts

Items that have crossed my mind in a sleep-deprived and delusional state:

• Will Oliver give me enough time to pee AND cut my toenails at the same time?
• Jeans count as pajama bottoms right?
• If this Stayfree pad was big enough, I would happily fall asleep on it.
• Can I wipe this booger on the bottom of his onesie?  It's not like he'll notice.
• Why is it that my husband has 3 nipples and not one of them can help me?  I bet he's holding out on me.
• I wonder if there's any moisturizing properties in spit-up.
• Maybe they need me at work today?
• Sssssstayyyyy...